1. An app like Tinder, but to find avocados in your area that are ripe and ready to be purchased.

Flickr Flickr

2. An app that sends you an alert every time the M&S pizza and prosecco deal is on

3. An app that locates pubs near you with snugs that are free and ready to sit in.

4. An app that finds clubs near you that are playing Beyoncé and Rihanna.

5. An app to find doughnuts in your area that are about to go stale and be put on special offer

Erin P / Twitter Erin P / Twitter / Twitter

6. An app that tells you when classic episodes of The Simpsons are about to start on telly.

Once that one’s successful, you can build one for Father Ted.

Giphy Giphy

7. An app that sends you periodic reminders that you’re premenstrual so that you can be like, “Oh that’s why I’m bawling at the AIB ad about the couple who paid off their mortgage.”

8. An app that identifies where people on the telly got their top from.

Channel 4 Channel 4

9. The ASOS shopping app… but for Penneys

IMAGINE.

10. An app to find taxis near you… with drivers that won’t make small talk with you

For when you just want peace and quiet.

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